Guadalupe Mountains Trip Report: 5/26/12-5/28/12

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” — Helen Keller

A week of being home from Nepal, I was already presenting classic signs withdrawals. How do I cure myself? Maybe sign up for a race........nah. Figure out my next trip of course! So, before the dust had even settled from my Nepal trip, I decided to tag along with some people going to the Guadalupe Mountains from the North Texas Outdoor Pursuit Center (bad ass rock climbing gym & outdoor gear outfitter). I've never been and it is one of the few parts of Texas I wanted to visit. My place looked like REI took a massive dump and gear turds were dropped all over the place. I hadn't put anything up yet......I think subconsciously I knew I would be go somewhere soon. :)

This particular trip didn't have my usual anal retentive planning since I was pretty much tagging along and letting someone else dictate the itinerary. All I was planning on doing was packing and going. What made this particular trip much different from my usual backpacking destinations, was this was going to be desert hiking. I'm not a fan of the heat and temps were forecasted to be in the 90's daytime and 60's night time. Most of my trips are in much cooler alpine temps......hell, I own more cold weather clothes, layers, gear AND I live in Texas. Why then go to the Guadalupe's? Meh, I'm all about putting myself in different situations, trying new things and I heard it was pretty. Plus a chance to get out of craptastic Dallas for a mini-adventure......IN! :) Yah, I don't much care for the heat but the real trick was going to be lowering my base pack weight so I could carry an additional 10-12lbs of water. The 3's of survival. Most people perish without: 3 minutes or air, 3 days of water or 3 weeks without food. Hot temps and I have to carry ALL my water? Mother F@cker! I'm not exactly an ultralight backpacker either. My pack is easily 40+ lbs and that is actually more than I should be carrying with my frame/height/weight ratio. *Sigh* No jumbo bags of Swedish Fish candy this go around. *pouts*.

Texas has mountains.......NO SHIT?!

Left at the ass crack of dawn from the DFW area and drove nine hours (endurance car ride....oof!) across the flat wasteland of Texas heading west. I passed out for a couple of hours and when I awoke we were driving through the Guadalupe Mountain range. WTH? Texas DOES have mountains. Huh. Who would have thought. Now, these mountains are nowhere near the size of the massive behemoths of the Himalayan range or even the Rockies (awwww, baby mountains!) but there was a rugged beauty that appealed to me. We were headed up the highest peak of Texas which is: Guadalupe Peak at 8,749 ft.
We arrived around 3:30 PM, stopped by the ranger station, picked
up our back country permits, grabbed our gear and headed out a little after 4:00 PM. We topped off on water at Pine Springs Campground because there are no sources of water up the mountain. I packed in about 10.3 lbs in water. So overall, my pack weighed just shy of 40lbs with all my gear and water. The hike up was 4 miles and a little over 3,000 ft of elevation gain.
My legs were a little angry for being cramped in a car for
9+ hours and now I was forcing them up a mountain with 40lbs
on my back. Also, note to self: don't eat a foot long, double meat sub from Subway and not expect stomach cramps. About halfway up, the weather started to turn. I was headed up a switchback when I saw a glimmer of lightening to the west (which was the direction we were headed). After a few minutes of watching the sky get a bit darker, the unmistakable streak of lightening lit up the west again followed by a loud boom of thunder. I hollered out "LIGHTENING!" That lit a fire under everyone's ass to get moving. We hastily covered our packs with our rain covers, dropped them on the trail and scrambled down the mountain off trail to take shelter under a rock outcropping. Thankfully, Owen thought quickly and grabbed a mango and badass Shelly has a knife in an ankle holster which he used to divide up the fruit. We munched on mango and had front row seats to watch the thunderstorm blow across the valley. It was awesome. Storm only lasted 20-30 minutes (and I forgot my rain jacket....FAIL T!) and as soon as it passed we grabbed our gear and continued on. As we were ascending, we saw a double rainbow (albeit a faint 2nd rainbow). "WHOOOA! OMG! OMG! OMG! WOOOO! OMG.....look at that....a double rainbow...." *weeps* What does this mean? OMG! It's so bright....AAHH! OOOHH! OMFG! *cries* (Youtube of double rainbow: here if you don't know what I'm referencing). Anyways, we made it to camp a little after 7:00 ish and set up to enjoy a solid day of traveling and decent pace up. The ground was pretty much solid slab of rock so I had to use head sized rocks to anchor my tent. I picked up this one rock and half a dozen beetles scurried about and startled the shit out of me. Yeah, I screamed like a little bitch. Had a great view of the valley where we set up our "kitchen", ate dinner and watched the sun set. After darkness enveloped up in an inky blanket, I finished last minute chores and crawled in my tent to get some shut eye.

What goes up, must come down:

I was drifting off to La-La land when a flashlight was so rudely pointed towards my tent. A man came up to our campsite and asked us to unzip our tents because he needed to speak with us. Ugh. Back in my college days, I remember park rangers crashing our campsites to make sure we were not drinking illegally. So, I'm grumpily thinking he is just doing an alcohol check.

Ranger: "Hey guys......sorry to disturb you but I'm going to have to ask you to pack up and evacuate."

Me (still groggy from sleep): *grunts* 

Tyler: "Huh? We just got here like 3 hours ago. What's going on?"

Ranger: "There is a wildfire to the west and there are 10-20 mph winds blowing this direction, so I'm sorry but you'll have to evacuate and descend back down the mountain immediately."

Me (less groggy): *grunts multiple F bombs*

So, at 11:00PM we packed up our shit as best as we could with the light of our headlamps and made our way down. Now, remember.....I'm Asian, female, the grace of a cow on ice AND I am legally blind without my contact lens. I wear dailies when I backpack, so I only had enough for the remaining trip and I already took my lens out and threw them away. I only had my glasses on, which I have no depth perception in (it's why I don't really drive at night) and I have a healthy dose of fear from falling down mountains while on the descent (Alaska trip 2010 is a very vivid reminder). Anyhoo, we loaded up our packs and made our way by the lights of our headlamps. I was the slowest one down the mountain because I could barely see and I was literally tapping my way down the mountain like a blind man. Not so much fun descending in pitch black darkness, sleepy, 40lbs on your back and not being able to see. Made it down without breaking anything (my toes felt like mashed potatoes) and set up camp in a patch coned off by the RV's. Not exactly like the scenic spot we had up on the mountain, but at almost 1:00 AM we were just exhausted and ready to crash. Turns out, one of the lightening bolts that I saw touched down and sparked the wildfire (click here for official report). Also come to find out, the ranger that woke us up rode a donkey up the mountain to tell us to evacuate. What!? Rude! At least bring enough donkey's for all our gear. *sigh* Like I said in a previous post......mother nature always has the final say. She can be one cruel bitch.

Damn it's f@cking hot! Oh....wait....this is the desert:

A little after 6:00 AM, I woke up to the searing sun shining in through my tent. Ugh. It was starting to feel like a sauna in there. Not used to waking up hot and sweaty when I camp out. I'm used to waking up in crisp cool mountain air fighting the urge to wake up because I'm nice and warm in my sleeping bag. This was only my second foray into dry arid desert hiking (GC was my first). Oh well, I signed up for this adventure.....time to go play! The fire closed off Guadalupe Peak trail so we had to go to a different trail. We were all pretty shelled from the night before so we decided to set up base camp at Pine Springs and head out to Mckittrick Canyon with just day packs for some more hiking. Nice easy pace, checked out Pratt House (a historical site on the trail), sat and napped a bit in the Adirondack chairs. Snacked a bit and headed to the Grotto where we napped on some benches. It was hot, we were tired and just taking it easy. Out of the shade and cover of trees the sun and heat was relentless. It was only slightly bearable because it was a "dry" heat. I also ran out of water the last mile or so......doh!  Heading back out I picked up the pace because I was tired of being beaten down in the heat, needed water stat....plus I had to pee and I was trying to make it back to the restrooms near the trail head. Ah yes, the joys of the outdoors. I don't regret any of it at all!

Final thoughts:
Definitely glad I went to check out the Guadalupe's. Very different from my usual alpin/mtn excursions but I probably won't go back in the summer. I was not ready for the heat because I was not heat acclimated, being in Nepal for almost three weeks. Daytime highs were mid 90's and night time was decent, at a comfortable 60. I would prefer to go back during cooler temps such as fall or winter but if you have a chance, go check out that part of Texas. It does not resemble anything like the flat ugliness of N. TX. It was actually lush in the desert with the recent rainfall and greenery covered most cliffs and mountains sides. Nice hiking and pretty scenery not found in most parts of the state. The rocky outcroppings of El Capitan with the surrounding rugged mountains are a beautiful back drop to the Chihuahuan desert.

Gear wise, I was checking out a new middle pack that I bought on sale from REI: the Millet Odyssee 45. I wanted to use a smaller pack than my REI Flash 65 pack because I have a tendency to fill up empty space.....the big purse syndrome. The more room you have, the more likely you'll fill it up with unnecessary crap. The size was perfect for this length and type of trip but I wasn't a fan of the narrow shoulder straps and there were no side mesh pockets for my nagalane bottles. I ended up clipping one bottle with a carabiner (which was annoying because it would sashay and swing as I hiked) and stashing the other in my pack. Anyways, I ended up returning it (REI has the BEST return policy) and swapping it out for an Osprey Kestral 45. My 24L day pack is by Osprey and I love it. The water from the faucet at Pine Springs is pretty terrible. It's drinkable but the limestone leaves a chalky dry after taste. I never felt like my thirst was quenched but I drank it down because I didn't have a choice. My toes looked like they went through a blender after our midnight decent. It didn't help that my toes were still raw from the trekking in Nepal. I might want to reconsider my "summer" sock & boot configuration of Vasque Briza GTX boots with thin wool socks. This is the second time I've gotten some gnarly blisters but not sure if it was because my toes were still a bit tender from Nepal. My "winter" set up, with the Vasque Breeze GTX boots, thin liner socks under thick wool socks have never left any blisters. Hmmmm.

Fun short trip and as always, it's not an adventure if everything goes to plan. Mother nature had a hand in the trip, I was a bit unprepared forgetting my rain jacket (still smacking my forehead over that) and I even forgot to put my SD card back in my camera (double smack on forehead). So, all my pics are from my iphone and a few are stolen from my hiking companions. Glad I got to hang out and get to know Tyler, Owen and Shelly from the NTOPC better. Thanks for putting up with my offensive humor. You guys rock!

Nepal Trip Report (Part I): 4/12/12-5/2/12

This was an amazing adventure of epic proportions: from the ultra-endurance flights & layovers, hair raising taxi rides, the insanity of Kathmandu, the adrenaline pumping flight to Lukla, the serene simplicity of mountain village life, the dramatic and ravishing scenery of the Himalayas, the bewitching Nepal culture infused in ancient tradition, and the warm, hard working and open nature of the Nepalese people. This was my dream trip and was everything I could dare to hope for and more.

Meet Aunt Thanh:

I can't write about my adventure without the mention of Aunt T. I told her that I was headed to Nepal and without even blinking she goes (think Ms. Swan from MadTV accent for her voice): "I want to go."  My aunt has been around the world and loves traveling (it's where I get it from). I love her "Bags packed, where are we going?" mentality. 

For those that know Aunt Thanh personally, no introductions are necessary. I'm sure you have a wealth of hilarious stories from my crazy aunt. This is the same aunt that told me a few days before my trip, and I requote this verbatim: "You know Tania, after you turn 29 this year, you should really think about settling down. You know you won't be pretty forever. Men have more options than women" For those that have not had the pleasure of meeting her, let me give you a quick synopsis. My mother died when I was 10 and my aunt was my mother figure growing up. She's lived an incredible life: survived poverty, war and many more atrocities so she was hard on me and did not coddle me whatsoever. I could write a massive book on her life, she has so many stories. Needless to say, she taught me to be independent, fearless, bluntly honest, and go for what I want in life. Wonder where my outspokenness, stubbornness and tenacity comes from? Look no further. She comes off mean and harsh (hmmm, see the connection?) with her outlandishly direct and disconcertingly frank comments but she has a heart of gold. She always means well but can be off putting to those not used to her lack of sensitivity. You are either offended or rolling with laughter from the sheer hilarity of her comments. She is a teller of unpopular truths. No one is immune from her observations or sharp tongue.

Through everything that I have gone through, she has always been there. She is my mentor, my inspiration for strength, my rock of stability, my vivacious Aunt Thanh.......the one and only (thank goodness because I don't think this world could handle two ;). 

To Nepal- 1 Destination, 2 Layovers, 3 Flights, 4 Countries, 5 Airplane Meals:

Apparently, I can make anything into an endurance event, and traveling is no exception. I flew out of DFW, to London, then had a 6 hr layover. London is where I was meeting up with my crazy Aunt Thanh. I walked around the terminal looking for her and decided to recruit the help of some nice British chaps at the information desk. After some harmless flirting (can I tell you I love the accent!) I persuaded them to put out a PA over the airport loudspeaker for my auntie. (They were only sightly breaking protocol......tee hee :). Once my auntie and I were reunited, we then flew to New Delhi, where we had a 5 hr layover and finally from there to Kathmandu. 20 plus hours of flight time, 11 plus hours of layover, equals a total of 31+ hrs to reach Kathmandu, Nepal which has a time difference of 11 hours and 45 minutes ahead of CST. Because of the long, stamina testing flights, I was fed a total of 5 meals and numerous snacks. Airplane food is at best.......warm? Guess I shouldn't really complain since I at least got fed. On top of the long flight and layover times, my sleep was sporadic and light at best. I utilized the free wine (on international flights) and melatonin but coach seats and airport benches don't make the best of beds. Can we say jet lagged?

Kathmandu- A City At The Crossroads;

I blearily stepped off the last plane and into the madness of Kathmandu. A sensory overload of sights, sounds and smells bombarded me. I am rarely afraid of riding in a car being female and Asian, it's not like I have the best driving skills. An ex-boyfriend once told me that anytime he wanted an adrenaline rush, he let me drive. The harrowing ride from the airport to the hotel was a death grip on the"oh shit" handle affair. The roads have no rules, rhyme or reason to me. Between the cars/vans/buses lumbering about, motor bikes would zip in & out between the vehicles, and add in the mix of slower bicycles, rick-shaws & pedestrians make for a crowded, distressing, honking cacophony of an experience. Adding to the mayhem of the traffic is that the city infrastructure is 70 years old, there are no stop signs or stop lights (patrol officers direct traffic) and there doesn't seem to be any road rules which adds fuel to the wild-wild west feel.

The city itself seems to be like every other developing world city that is barreling down head long for impact of modernization but look closer and you'll find that there are parts still steeped with it's deep rich historical culture. The city itself is a contrast of old and new: a bustling commercial hub with people everywhere yet dotted with enchanting medieval temples. There is a lot of pollution and dust. I think due to inversion, a heavy hazy cloud constantly clings over the city and obscures the surrounding mountain views. Trash, debris, and ruins are visible at the side of the road. Remember, this is still a third world country with a fairly new democract and parliament painfully & slowly trying to get order about. With that said, I never once felt afraid wandering the streets. Even with this city trying to find it's foot hold in the modern era, I was never fearful for my life. Almost got clipped a few times by motorbikes and cars but being a cyclist, I'm pretty used to that. Kathmandu has many different castes, ethnic groups and religions but with all the differences they coincide in harmony. Thamel market is a bargainer's dream. There are endless stalls of trinkets, baubles, clothes, trekking gear, ect to be haggled over. I had a blast buying jewelry, scarfs, shirts, hats, and other random knick knacks, but the true professional haggler is my aunt. Back in November of 2011, we went to Arizona she had declared to the Asian Enterprise car rental agent that: "We are Vietnamese. We are the cheap jews of the Asians." Oh, how true she lived up to that proclamation. I was able to haggle 30-50% of the price down but she would routinely get things 60-75% off the price. I think she was a sales rep in a previous life.

Shanker Hotel:

We stayed in The Shanker Hotel for the three days before leaving for the trek through the mountains and then again for two days when we got back from trekking. It is an old palace now converted to a four star hotel. The hotel was a beautiful retreat from the craziness of the city. The huge garden provided a refreshing and quiet oasis with a swimming pool, dozens of cabanas and bright, colorful pretty landscaping in contrast to the brown dust tinged city. The service is top notch from expectant and helpful staff. The breakfast buffet served from 6-10 AM, was a great way to start every morning. The hotel has a lot of character with lots of detailed inlaid molding depicting Hindu gods, people and design. Rooms come standard with flat screen TV's, personal AC unit and plenty of space. The bathrooms were modern, updated, granite counter tops and showers which is up to par by western standards. I think my only complaint was that my bed was hard as a rock. Overall, I had a very pleasant and relaxing stay.

The Himalayas-"The Roof Top of the World":

This hiking adventure is not for the faint heart, lazy, or those squeamish about lack of western bathroom standards. If your only idea of vacation is a 5 star luxury all inclusive resort on plush beds.........this is not for you. If you can rough it a bit & put some leg work in, you will be rewarded by breathtaking vistas, awe inspiring beauty, a welcoming international crowd of touring trekkers, and high Himalayan hospitality. This type of trip is an adventure of a lifetime with experiences & memories that will touch you to the core.

When my aunt decided she wanted to tag along on my trip, I sent her a packet of information of Nepal's history, customs, my trek itinerary, what type of accommodations we would be staying at in the mountains and what to pack. I bought ALL her hiking gear for her so all she had to do was buy hiking boots and pack what I sent her. I even booked her flights......literally, I handed everything on a silver platter. She somehow managed to fail miserably. She didn't pack all the gear I bought, didn't even look or read any of the material that I sent. So, the night before we were leaving for the hiking portion of the trip, she and I got into a HUGE fight. I was so angry that she didn't read a SINGLE line of information and failed to pack the necessary items. She had absolutely no idea what she signed up for because she didn't have enough sense to read. W.T.F? I had to keep throwing things out because we had to keep our combined gear under 33 lbs for the porter but she wanted to bring numerous outfits for every day (this ain't the Miss America pageant). She didn't pack pretty important pieces of gear: like the hiking pants, water bladder, nagalene water bottle, sun hat, bandanna, ect that I specifically bought. It was a very angry & tension filled night, with neither one of us willing to back off. My aunt is not used to being on the receiving end of a verbal barrage laced with profanity. I usually don't cuss in front of or at my Aunt but my anger got the better of me. I wasn't afraid of her wrath or of anybody for that matter. Hell, she taught me that.

Lukla Flight:

The main event of this trip was the hiking (called trekking over in Nepal) through the highest mountain range in the world. Since I only had limited time to get my adventure done, I had chosen a 12 day itinerary that started in Lukla which is the entrance of the Khumbu region. It is a short 20-30 minute flight from Kathmandu to Lukla......in a small Otter airplane. You know it's going to be a hell of a ride when the flight attendant passes out cotton balls for your ears and bubble gum. The last time I was in an Otter, I jumped out of it. Oh, on top of being crammed in a small prop plane, the air strip in Lukla is the shortest runway in the world. 500 meters long, uphill and at the end there is a wall. Considered one of the 10 most dangerous airports in the world. Click here to see a bit of what I experienced. It was absolutely insane. I LOOOOVED it. :)

The "Breathtaking" Trek:
Starting off, you stroll through the green valley of the Khumbu region. Daytime temperatures were warm and in the 60-70's with night time temps dipping to the 50's at "lower" elevation. (To this flat-lander, anything over 1,000 ft is elevation, HA!) The trail is easy to follow and you are usually surrounded by teams of yaks, other trekkers and porters. At times it was very crowded but every once in awhile I would find myself alone, lost in the utter magnificence of the Himalaya's. The hike is not a stroll in a park (aprx 75+ miles & over 10,000 ft of elevation gain). There is a lot of up and down and very little "flats". Mountain people and non-mountain people have two very different ideas of "flat". Look, I live in north Texas.....I know what flat is (the Nepalese mountain people don't count anything less than 20,000ft a mountain.....they call them "hills" :P ). As the days progressed, the difficulty became more apparent with the increase in altitude and pronounced "uphill" hiking. Going up is a lung searing and quad shredding affair with elevations ranging from 9,000 to 17,000+ ft, so breathing becomes a slight issue (like, "who the fuck turned off the oxygen" feeling). Each day I would hike 5-8 hours and my aunt an hour or two more than that (I was ahead and Egla the guide or Rusha the porter split to accompany either my aunt or I). In "higher" elevation, 12,000 ft + it becomes a bit chillier and as we wound higher and further into the Khumbu region the winds began to pick up. At 14,000+ ft you are out of treeline and without the treeline to shelter you, the winds start to bite with fine flecks of sand invading your eyes & nasal cavities. Breathing was noticeably harder, deep sleep became difficult to attain and loss a bit of my appetite. But the mountain views became even more dramatically grandiose. The peaks looked extremely close due to their massive size and height (surrounded by 20,000+ ft mtns). Daytime temps were 60's-50's F and night time lows were in the 40's-20's. Had almost perfect weather with only one brief shower on the way up to Tengboche and snow on our our first night in Dingboche. At 16,000+ ft, breathing, thinking and walking became a chore. It was an uphill death slog for me but the phenomenal beauty around me kept me from thinking of my discomfort. My pictures never do any of my trips justice and my images of this trip are woefully sub-par to seeing it in person.

 Mountain Accommodations: We hiked from village to village so there was no need to pack tent, cooking supplies, ect and slept in tea houses. What are tea houses? Tea houses are basic lodges that have a central dining area with numerous wooden tables and benches for seating. They heat the main dining hall with stoves fueled with yak shit. The lights in the dining hall are powered with a generator but would only be utilized once it was completely dark outside and they closed down the dining area around 9:00 PM. The sleeping rooms are very basic, with 2 wooden cots, an anemic thin foam mattress, blankets and
pillows. Rooms do not have a heat source, so you must rely on layers, sleeping bag and blankets for warmth. Some rooms come with a private "toilet" while other lodges have "community" toilets. The further up you go in the mountains the more basic the amenities become. The tea houses are about a few steps up from tent camping because these structures are not insulated and made of paper thin walls of plywood. I could hear my neighbors snore, fart, piss, crap and fornicate. The tea houses below 12,000 ft that we stayed at had western style indoor private in room toilets. Above that altitude, the tea houses had "western" looking toilets but no indoor plumbing which meant you flushed by pouring water with a bucket until your waste was pushed down by weight and gravity. The other "toilet" commonly found is the "Eastern" style which is a porcelain hole in the ground with a bucket of water to "flush". Then some tea houses were only outfitted with an outhouse. A shack with a wooden floor, hole cut in the middle to do your business and a pile of dirt compost to kick in the hole to keep the foul smells at bay. Hot showers are a
true luxury in the mountains. I took only three showers, day 2, 9, and last day (yeah, no one smelled like roses). The picture to the right shows a shower head, but what it doesn't show is the toilet right next to it. You could literally be on the pot and shower at the same time. There is no separation from the shower and toilet area. Further up in altitude, there are no "proper" showers because of 1.) no indoor plumbing  2.) water becomes a very precious resource. In Dingboche, I paid roughly $5 for a bucket of hot water to clean myself. I stood in a small room with a drain while I poured the rapidly cooling water over myself. When I didn't have the option of a hot shower or bucket sponge bath, I had to depend on "backpacker" wipes which are over glorified wet wipes, but still a bone chilling experience. At that altitude and temperatures, it was a miracle I even took off my clothes and suffered through wet and cold "whore's" bath. My teeth would chatter uncontrollably while I tried to quickly wipe down with multiple citrus scented wipes. Hot visual huh?

Himalayan Cuisine: Nepal's mountains are not exactly known for their gourmet cuisine, but I didn't exactly starve either. We
were warned not to eat meat because 1.) all the food at the tea houses for trekkers are flown from Kathmandu to Lukla and transported on the back of yaks or sherpas (more on this later) so you have no idea how old the meat is. 2.) In high altitude, it is not wise to eat protein heavy meals because more blood flow is needed for your gut to help digest, but your lungs come first when lack of O2 hinders your ability to breathe. Your body will naturally prioritize where blood flow is needed most. So either way, eating meat could cause your GI system to go on full mutiny which is the last thing you want. So, for almost

two weeks I was on a vegetarian/carbo heavy diet. No meat and also no alcohol until I was on the descent. The food was pretty decent for the most part except for a pizza I ordered in Namache because I was tired of Dal Bhat (traditional Nepalese meal of rice, lentil soup, & curry) The pizza was so bland and tasteless I barely choked it down. Also understand, a lot of tea house cooks have never had "real" western food but have rough, verbally passed recipes so many things might be lost in translation. After that incident, I kept to more traditional Nepal offerings and didn't have a problem. My favorite food in the mountains were the potatoes. I would have a side of potatoes with almost every meal from breakfast to dinner. Potatoes are the only crops that can survive in the nutrient deficient mountain soils, harsh temperatures and little water. They were so freaking delicious. Descending back to Lukla, I was finally able to eat meat and drink beer. The chicken was a bit dry but the tasty Everest beer helped wash it down.

Superhuman Sherpas: As stated earlier, we had a sherpa porter to carry our extra gear while we had our daypacks with extra layers, water, snacks, med kit, camera, ect. Spare clothing, sleeping bag, ect went with the sherpa. Before you lambaste me for hiring one, understand that I do have experience backpacking so I know exactly what 45lbs on the back feels like. I also know that this hike is no joke with the terrain and altitude. Also, by hiring a porter, you are helping their economy (I also tipped $158 to my Sherpa, so I'm not a senseless, uncaring American tourist) For my tri-dork friends, 4 time World Ironman Chrissie Wellington spent 16 months working in Nepal where she mountain biked through the Himalayas. There is a reason why the Sherpa people are world re-known & unsurpassed for their strength and endurance in the mountains. They are uniquely & genetically gifted for high altitude and they leverage this to try to provide a better life for their families by carrying huge loads up and down the mountains (paid by weight). Rusha, our sherpa was completely invaluable and an integral piece to us not dying. I could count on 2 hands the number of tourist trekkers that carried their own packs. Kudos to them with their fancy $200+ Osprey backpack with weight distributing straps and air flow vent (I can be snarky b/c I own said fancy gear) but the sherpa's were the true "superhumans". They carried massive loads with nothing more than rope, baskets & straps across their forehead while walking slightly bent over. The trail that we trekked is not only for tourists but it is the only way for supplies (everything from lumbers, food, goods) to get to the remote mountain villages via the backs of sherpas, yaks or mules. The terrain is so rugged, there are no paved roads and completely impassable by motor vehicles. Saw everything from gallons of fluids (maybe petrol?), water reservoirs, lumber, multiple slabs of plywood, and even a fucking fridge! Absolutely mind blowing the physical stamina and strength that they have. I think IM athletes are badass but the Sherpa's blow any endurance athlete out of the water and make even the super active and fit groups of our society look like a bunch of fucking posers. My aunt who has survived the Vietnam War, poverty, and knows what hard labor is but even she bowed down to their unparalleled stamina and was in awe of Himalayan mountain peoples backbreaking work ethic.

Stay tuned for part II of my Nepal adventure.......................

Smoky Mountain Trip Report: 2/23/12-2/27/12

First trip of 2012! Woo!

Summer and Fall are busy season in Great Smoky Mtn National Park with over 9 million visitors coming through a year. (Random Fact: GSMNP is one of the only FREE NP's in the system: http://www.nps.gov/grsm/planyourvisit/whyfree.htm) My expectations of finding solitude were non-existent even coming in during the "off season", but I wanted to see the Smoky's dammit!

Flew into Knoxville and picked up my *snicker* bitchin wheels. A Kia Soul. Yeah.....well, I Hotwired it for $14 a day! I decided to stay in a hotel this go around because I am not completely comfortable in my winter backpacking skills especially alone. My adventure into Northern NM last year where we ran into 2-3 feet of snow in the higher elevations showed how badly lacking my winter backpacking skills are. I still have a lot to learn for cold weather backpacking. Anyways, last year was a really bad winter for most of the East Coast. I had decided on doing this trip in February back in December  and didn't know what the weather conditions would be like. This year has been a fairly mild winter for the lower 48 due to La Nina.

Pigeon Forge: a petri dish of tacky themed restaurants & entertainment advertised by bright gaudy neon blinking signs that were about to give me seizures. Pretty much, Las Vegas's smaller, less sophisticated, uglier, un-popular, red-headed 7th cousin. I get it......it's a tourist trap for families with 2.5 children. Anyways, I already booked my hotel here (free with my points) so I was stuck. No matter, I pretty just much slept and ate here.

Day 1: Noah Bud Ogle, Twin Creek, Sugarland Trails

Got into PF, got checked in early at noon (Priority Member....Woot!), dropped of my stuff, grabbed my gear and off to the trails I went! Now I am an A+++, anal retentive person. I am usually the person that researches the hell out of everything, has a list of places I want to see, eat, ect. Not this time around. I didn't even trip advise my hotel (Holiday Inn Express are pretty consistent though), I def did not know that Pigeon Forge was an atrocity to the senses......well, if I researched it I would have found that Dollyland was located there and that would have clued me in. Anyways, I didn't even really know what hikes I wanted to do. I had a tentative list, my trusty Falcon Guide book on GSMNP trails and my Iphone to navigate. I literally picked one out of the book and drove there. I got to the parking lot and there wasn't a single car! The first hike wasn't stunning with mountain vistas or leg shredding elevation, but it was nice, peaceful and quiet. The trail followed a stream and had some replica's of old pioneer buildings. Most exciting thing I saw were wild turkeys! Gobble-gobble! I did 4 miles and didn't see a single soul until I got back to a car when a minivan from Louisiana pulled up and 3 kids came spilling out. (Phew. Everyone knows how much I love kids!) I got back in the car and decided to stop by the visitor's center for some info and when I got there, there was a sign for a nature trail. Okie dokie, found my next little walk. Did maybe 1.2 miles, very easy relaxing walk to cataract falls and there were a bunch of interpritive plaques along the way.

Day 2: Alum Cave Trail to Mt. Leconte


The first day was literally a walk in the park.....the second day.....not so much. This was one of the hikes that I HAD to do. It is also one of the most popular as well because it has 2 well known interest points. Alum Caves at 4.6 miles round trip and Mt. Leconte Lodge at 11 miles round trip with most people opting for the shorter hike. I knew to beat the crowds I was going to have to hit the trail head early and I knew that this was going to take up most of my day. I made it around 9:00 AM starting at lower elevation at 29 degrees F. Buuurrrr. Nice, I love hiking when it's cold and brisk out. I actually found some solitude which was quite surprising given the reputation of how crowded this hike gets. I passed a couple of hikers and a few passed me but it wasn't the theme park line I thought it was going to be. Met some nice people on the trail and chatted a bit. Just a perfect day for a hike, went my own pace, stopped to take pictures, just enjoyed being outside and soaked in the scenery. The hike to Alum Cave was pretty gentle and followed a river for the most part. Lot's of bridge crossings but nothing too technical. After Alum Caves, the real fun started. The climb got noticeably steeper and parts of the trail had some ice. YESSSSS! Micro crampon time! One of my favorite pieces of gear! :) About 2- miles from the summit, I met a father and daughter from FL chugging along to the top. The

daughter was about 9 years old and was sooo freaking cute and was a little hiking machine. Now, I don't normally like kids, but this one was a girl after my own heart. Stubborn, tenacious, outdoorsy and blunt. Kind of reminds me of someone.......They were really nice so I decided to hike with them to the top (plus there were signs warning of bear activity......). The father was an engineer and had hiked the Smokies pretty exclusively so he knew a lot about the area. Got my own personal tour guide, ha! When we got to the top he showed me Myrtle Point, High Top and Cliff Top (which I would not have known about) that added a couple of miles to the standard 11 miles to Leconte Lodges. The actual summit of Mt Leconte is pretty anti-climatic.....it is literally a big pile of rocks. The story is, some people wanted Mt. Leconte to be the highest peak in the Smokies (currently 3rd) and some good humored hikers started piling rocks at the summit. The real views are found at Myrtle Point and Cliff Tops with sweeping vistas of the Smoky Mountains. While hiking I usually build up a sweat....no, seriously....I am a sweaty sweaty she beast. I was in a few layers, no thermals (because I wanted to test out some new "hiking" panties and just didn't think about how cold it would be at elevation, doh!), light gloves, neck gaiter, beanie and was ok hiking up. When I made it to the top where the mountain was exposed like Cliff Top, the winds were howling 20-30 miles, air temp at 17 degrees and wind chill feel like temps at 0. Ugh....not one of my brightest moments. Winds felt like little pin needless stabbing my legs and butt, my hands had gone numb.....can we say "asking for hypothermia"? I also got summit fever and the closer we got to the top the less I drank and I hadn't eaten anything yet (which is weird b/c I'm always hungry). Needless to say after a harrowing steep decent down the iced over trail from Cliff Tops, I was freezing and starving. We found a picnic table by the lodges, where I finally put on my thicker gloves, down jacket and rain jacket to block out the wind and tore into our food. Since I was doing a poor job of re-hydrating myself, the water in my camelbak hose froze completely solid. Good thing for my back up water bottle (which had ice chips in it as well). I would've killed for a hot drink. It was so cold and windy I inhaled my food and decided to descend without my new found trail friends because my body was starting to go numb sitting there. The decent was pretty fast because I was half jogging to get warmed back up again. I did slip on some ice because of bad footing and I decided to slow my roll. I am incredibly clutzy (I have the grace of a cow on ice) and I do have a healthy dose of fear of slipping on a mountain. It's happened a few times before.....Anyways, made it back safely without any serious incidents. 13+ miles, 2,835 ft of elevation in about 8 hours. It was an amazing day.

 Day 3: Spruce Flat Falls & Gatlinburg

 On day 3, my goal was to do 2 shorter day hikes and explore Gatlinburg for the rest of the day because I knew my legs would probably be pretty shredded from day 2. The night before, I sat down and did some quick research on which hikes to do and I wanted to find waterfalls. First hike of the day was Spruce Flat Falls (not so flat, btw....at least it didn't feel like it) and woke up early to get to the trail head before anybody else. Found the TH,

started off going up hill over a few switchbacks. This particular hike wasn't the most scenic until I hit the waterfalls. I was the only one there. BOOM! Early bird gets the worm. Took off my pack and climbed on the boulders and rocks, played around in the water a bit (it was nippy) and just enjoyed having the falls completely to myself. The sound of rushing water is just really relaxing, I was just listening to the falls and enjoying how peaceful it was. After 30 minutes of enjoying the falls to myself, I decided to head out so I could find my next trail. Last quarter mile of the hike I ran into a line of 20 people headed to the falls. YES! I beat the rush. *bigstupidgrinonmyface*. Hike # 2 was Grotto Falls, and as I got to the road to turn onto it was closed. Mother F*$%er! Big failboat on my part.......hiking guide clearly states trail is closed until mid March. I blame my blind crappy, slanty, asian eyes. *Sigh* At this point I was a bit frustrated and hungry so I decided to just head to Gatlinburg to eat and explore. Had a stack of waffles and ham, then headed down the main street of Gatlinburg. Gatlinburg wasn't as garish as PF, but there were herds hoards lot's of F'ing people, mmmkay? I literally went from fudge & candy shop to fudge & candy shop sampling my way through Gatlinburg. O.M.G. Fresh fudge and candy are the BOMB-diggity. I don't even know how many mouth orgasm's I had. After a few hours of wandering the streets, a tummy ache from eating my way through the town, legs were screaming, and made a big dent in my wallet buying sweets for my friends & family, I decided to head back to the my hotel at PF.

Day 4: Chimney Tops

This was my last day in the Smokey's and I was hell bent determined in getting one last mini-adventure before heading back to the metromess. My flight didn't leave until 4:10 PM so I knew if I woke up early enough I could squeeze one last hike. I had already arranged a late check out (priority member= princess get's her way) so I could still clean up after my hike. The other hike I knew I "had" to do, was Chimney Tops, another of one of the most popular hikes in the park. Not super long at 4 miles RT, but the elevation gain was 1,700+ in the first 2 miles and the scramble/rock climb to the summit had me intrigued. I decided to do this on Monday morning as opposed to the weekend based on Falcon Guide's advice because I had read it could get very crowded and to beat the masses: 1.) go during off season, 2.) on a weekday, 3.) early in the morning. Headed out early after breakfast and found myself alone on the trail again. Who says you can't find solitude in the busiest national park in the US?

Pffft. Lot's of river crossings and the first mile was a "gentle" uphill. At 1.1 miles, it all changes. That was a seriously tough .9 miles and with over 25 miles in my legs, they were a little pissed off. Other than my legs giving me the big middle finger, I felt pretty strong. I swear whoever designed this trail has never heard of a switchback. By the time you hit a couple of switchbacks your are already close to the top and it levels out. Kind of evil. Besides me cursing like usual, this hike was beautiful. I got to the base of Chimney Tops and time for the final push. Now on a normal, good weather day this climb is pretty harrowing for the non uber climbers. This particular day was cloudy, foggy and misty (trailhead sign warns of dangers of climbing the Tops when rock is wet). Ummm, I did not bust my ass and hike all the way up there not to make it to the top. I was going for it. To hell with warnings, danger signs and common sense. I sometimes have more balls than brains. I strapped my poles to my pack, tightened the straps and up I went. I'm a very beginner rock climber and feel pretty comfortable on the walls with harness, ropes and a belayer. Erm. I had

me, myself and I. To make things worse (besides the slick wet rock) I was a little unbalanced with my day pack and big chunky hiking boots don't really allow me to smear or get my foot in the right position and I wasn't tied down to anything. So if I fell, it would've probably hurt.....a lot. Yeah, I had the epiphany half way up. After a few close calls and life flashing before my eye moments, I made it to the top. Breathtaking. (ok, that might have been mostly the climb). Not the ideal day to see the surrounding mountains with low visibility due to fog but I was so happy to have made it to the top without breaking my neck and I had the summit completely to myself! I don't know how to explain the rush of adrenaline, endorphin, and dopamine bombarding me. I love that feeling, that intensity coursing through my veins, all senses heightened, tingling sensation all over my body. I was literally high on life, as cliche as that is. As I was being introspective, the sensation was only deepened by the fact that I did it alone (again) and I reveled in the fact that I am completely at ease by myself, in my own skin, in my own thoughts and love who I am for all my flaws and weaknesses. (I'm slightly confident....what?). If I were a dude, I probably would have had a hard on with how freaking happy I was in that particular moment. I sat on top with the biggest damn grin on my face, just so stoked to have the health & means to see and experience all that I do and once again reflected on another amazing trip.